It was only going to be a couple of weeks until I saw my Husband again! I have been counting down the days since I arrived back in England but now I will not be going to India for Diwali.
I was sat on my sofa and flicked through my passport, and then the water marks on each of the pages caught my eye. The colours on the pages had merged in some places. I had used my passport as proof of identity when collecting a package from the post office and it rained on the way back. The water had made a big purple bubble in the corner of my biodata age and the water had even got onto my visa.
Frantically searching through the pages that Google threw up, I tried to see if I could still travel to India on this passport. All of the forums, websites and blogs said the same thing- passport invalid. I started to hyperventilate… I cannot get a new passport and visa in time for Diwali. I had to sit down. The thought of being reunited with my Husband so soon has been pulling me through these past couple of months but my own carelessness means I am stuck in the UK until I can get a new passport and visa.
That same day my manager told me I might not be able to take the full 3 weeks I had planned to take (even though I am entitled to this much holiday) due to the fact it is so close to Christmas and the pharmacy is at its busiest during this time. I had already thought my plans were ruined… but now it was confirmed. I am not going to be able to go to India this October.
I was already quite anxious because when the immigration officer in Mumbai stamped my boarding card when I was leaving India he tucked it into my passport. The wet red ink from the stamp had transferred from my boarding pass onto my visa. I didn’t know if they would accept this visa but had been convincing myself that I could explain what had happened and all would be fine. The visa runs out mid November so I don’t even think they would issue me with a replacement.
These 3 factors together means it is just impossible for me to go. I could not stop crying, I felt so horrible. Why was everything conspiring to keep me away from my Husband?????
Together, my Husband and I tried to think of a solution to this passport problem. I was changing my mind whether I should try and risk it every other minute. One second I would be confident that I wouldn’t have any problems because all of the information itself on the passport is clear… but the next minute I was certain that they would not let me leave Heathrow with a passport in this state. I am planning to live in India for the rest of my life; I don’t want to get in trouble with immigration!!
Slowly we came to terms with the fact that we are going to have to endure some more separation. We started to look at the big picture. I will have to wait 2 months after my visa expires (so I am told) until I can have a new visa. This means I will be going to India in February, so I may be missing Diwali but we will spend Valentines day together. The other positive part of this water damage disaster is that February is the exact midpoint of our 12 month separation. If I had gone to India for Diwali we would have had to endure the 9 months after Diwali without seeing each other! At least when we are saying goodbye at Mumbai in February, (for the last time ever) we will be seeing each other again in 6 months.
It has been a roller-coaster of emotions but we now feel that going in February is a good idea (when looking at the big picture- I would give anything to get on a plane right now!!). I miss my Husband so much, I cannot even put into words how much it hurts.
(I have already bought a protective cover for my new passport!!)